Have there been times when you were in a dire situation and needed help but didn’t know whom to approach? Have there been times when you wanted to talk to someone outside your family or friends’ circle? Times when you felt you had enough and just couldn’t take it anymore?

You are not alone. All of us go through these experiences — some even on a daily basis — when we feel like talking to someone about that nagging feeling in our heads or discussing something that has been bothering us for a while. And that is all right.

Counselling, to put it simply, is a very normal and healthy mode of communication. It involves a counsellor and a client who spend quality time together communicating and taking productive action. By productive action, we mean doing something towards reaching a goal,however big or small it might be. For example, if Sanjana has been thinking of talking to someone about the issues bothering her, approaching a counsellor and beginning to express her thoughts and feelings is her first step towards productive action.

Counselling is also a process in which the relationship formed between you and your counsellor helps you develop more awareness and understand yourself better. Your counsellor’s job is to act like a mirror and reflect back to you your behaviour, thoughts and feelings in a way that helps you understand them more clearly — and sometimes from a different perspective.

You don’t need a crisis to see a counsellor

There are times when we may be ready to make the first move and approach a counsellor. However, what may stop us are doubts like: what sort of issues are suitable for counselling? Is my issue big enough, or am I overreacting? These questions are absolutely valid — and very common.

We often have a crisis-oriented approach to counselling and use it as a last resort during an emergency. But counselling can happen even when there is no particular problem at hand. It provides knowledge about yourself and others who matter to you. It gives you a deeper understanding of people and relationships, and equips you with useful life skills that enhance the quality of your life.

Why Indians hesitate to seek counselling

Counselling is not meant to be an exclusive service accessible to only a few. But it carries various misconceptions in our culture and society. Indian culture is one in which family forms our biggest support system — we always have someone to confide in, be it a spouse, a parent, grandparent or extended family. The idea of going outside the family to share our deepest thoughts with a stranger is not very popular. Many people feel they are betraying their family’s trust by doing so.

In order to clear up these misconceptions, it is important to become aware of what counselling is really about. Counselling is open to one and all. There is no rule that you should only go to a counsellor with very serious problems.

Counselling is for everyone

Counselling is not a gender-specific or crisis-only service. It caters to every human being — individuals, couples, families, children and teenagers. You do not need to be in a mental health crisis to benefit from it. Many people use counselling for personal growth, self-awareness and building better relationships.

How is a counsellor different from a friend?

Talking to a counsellor is very different from talking to a friend or family member. A counsellor is a non-judgmental, objective and empathetic listener who can help you view your problems from a different perspective. When we talk to those we love, it becomes hard for them to separate their own opinions and feelings about you from the advice or help they give you. A counsellor has no such bias.

So the next time you feel the need to talk to someone or sort things out in your mind, consider counselling as a viable option.