I don’t want to GO to a counsellor! You don’t GO to a counsellor! We go to a doctor when we are ill, and often, a quick dose of medicine makes the pain or illness go away. To have the same expectation from counselling may not be right. So, you don’t go to a counsellor, […]

“Everyone thinks of changing the world, but no one thinks of changing himself.”  Leo Tolstoy Tolstoy was certainly onto something. Often, while working with clients in my practice, I hear them say things like, “If only she changed, then I could be more patient with her”, “If she didn’t provoke me so much, I wouldn’t […]

Ajay’s Problems at Work and Home  Ajay felt like he lost complete control of his life. At work nothing seemed to go right and this affected his personal life as well. He felt un-appreciated and helpless. His relationships at home too were spiraling down hill. He felt he was under too much pressure at work and […]

“I don’t know…” “I have really tried everything – nothing works!” “I wish I knew…” “Maybe there IS no way out of this.” “It’s all very clear in my head – but when it comes to actually doing something, I feel lost.” And of course, “Why don’t you tell me what to do to change […]

Are you wondering whether to meet a counsellor or a coach? At first glance counselling and coaching appear similar because the professionals involved use similar skills such as active listening, empathy, harmony, establishing rapport, building trust and the use of powerful, probing questioning. There are some very real differences however, in the approach, purpose, goals, […]

Amit had a heart attack during a business meeting. Never in a million years did he believe that he would have a heart attack at the early age of 33. After months of cardiac rehab, physiotherapy and nutrition counselling, he was finally ready to lead a normal life. However, he found himself having nightmares and […]

Many years ago two salesmen were sent by a British shoe manufacturer to Africa to investigate and report back on market potential. The first salesman reported back, “There is no potential here – nobody wears shoes.” The second salesman reported back, “There is massive potential here – nobody wears shoes.” Someone said – It’s not […]

There are times in our lives when we are faced with situations in which we must stand up for ourselves. It may involve a friend who continuously borrows money from us. It may be a noisy neighbor playing his music too loud. Or a poor performance rating at work that you feel you don’t deserve. […]

Asha is a well-educated, independent young woman of 25. She lives with her parents and younger brother. Around the age of 15, she first discovered that she felt emotionally and sexually attracted to girls. Despite the initial turmoil, she has grown comfortable with her sexual identity and considers it to be a valuable part of […]

What is a boundary, psychologically speaking? It is something that marks off where one person begins and ends. It isn’t exactly a wall, because it can be flexible (move backward or forward) and because it can be permeable (allow ideas/ people in and out). It is just there, and that is its primary function. It […]

Wear the blue jeans or the black? Eat now or regret later? Speak up or shut up? Every waking moment, we’re making choices. Each choice is a fork in our road, where our decision will take us left or right. The power of choice is something that can make or break an individual. Choices can […]

“Be a man” – when are men told that? Pretty much every time they’re upset or sad or worked up about some issue. So what does it mean then, to be a man about these things? It means that you’re supposed to work on logic and practical thought. It means that you see a problem […]

“I am important to me” How many of us can say that? In a culture that celebrates selflessness and sacrifice, it is likely that even if we said it, we would be met with criticism rather than appreciation. And yet, take a moment to think about the paradox: you demand that others value you for […]

Without exception, we all have people we are attached to in our lives. Some people we love, some we like, some we dislike and some we hate. Some people are very secure in our attachments while some others might constantly question if their relationships will last. The way we view ourselves in relationships and our […]

‘Love is a sacrifice’. Give everything of yourself to those you love and if there is anything left, give that too! Most of our popular movies, songs and books imply that to love someone is to be so unselfish that we should not say no to anything they ask of us. A 13 yr old […]

Power Struggles in Families Have you often found yourself debating whether you should be the first one to give in after a fight with your partner? You experience an inner struggle between your ego and your desire to make things right in the relationship. If you give in, you might feel like you are surrendering […]

Did you ever feel you had to do something for someone you didn’t really want to? Were there times when you had to give way to someone because the idea of saying ‘No’ was too hard to contemplate? These situations may sound familiar because you or those around you have experienced similar incidents. And perhaps […]

All the world’s a stage, And all the men and women merely players: They have their exits and their entrances; And one man in his time plays many parts… -William Shakespeare Theatre is a unique gift to us in that it allows us to temporarily immerse ourselves in another world. While watching a play, you […]

‘Am I good enough?’ This is a question many of us have asked ourselves at some point or other in our lives, whether it is in relation to our appearance, our personality, work, academics, relationships and any other area of our life in which our abilities are tested. Sometimes the answer to the question above […]

‘Men are insensitive’ ‘Women are bad drivers’ ‘All men love sports and sex ’ ‘All women love shopping and gossiping’ How often have we heard these comments in our culture? Some people may feel angry when gender based comments are made, while others may agree to these comments as genuine differences between the sexes or […]